Updated: Jan 13

January 2nd, 2020

Although maybe the line between one year and the next is artificial, to me it feels like the perfect opportunity to wipe the slate clean. It's our chance to resolve to change what needs to change and keep what doesn't. Our problems didn't magically disappear when the clock struck 12:00 am, January 1st. But maybe our mindset could shift into one full of hope and optimism. Maybe we could take a breath, come up for air after the devastating changes and endless bad news of the past year.

This January to me feels like a month of unbridled hope. A month to examine what we've learned over the past year, how we've changed, how we've grown. A month to put it all into practice. A month to look towards the future with joy instead of fear. It might seem like an impossible task - but it can be done. I'm treating January like a reset button. I'm taking the time to think deeply about every aspect of my life and decide what I should do differently, and I'm also honoring the fact that I am doing some things right. I'm not just going to discard my entire personality and lifestyle at the gates of the new year, and I'm not going to make any drastic changes. It's the little things for me. I'm purposefully changing a handful of little things, little things that I'm excited about and that I think will improve my life in tiny ways. That works better for me than just up and trying to become a different person.

When we make purposeful changes, we have to work within our own framework. I'm not suddenly going to become a naturally organized, hard working, neat person who's good at math. I'm just ... not. But I am working on some things that could make organization and scheduling easier for me, like keeping a calendar and (trying) to clean my room every day. Similarly, I can't force myself to be an extrovert. That isn't how my brain is wired. I will never be a party person. I will never not be exhausted by the boundless energy of my theatre-kid peers (although I do love them). I will never be able to keep up with them, either. And that's okay. But I am going to give my best effort to intentionally make the most of my social opportunities. I am going to try not to skip social outings even if I don't really want to go, because I need to stretch myself and I want to make memories. I'll just make sure to go on a walk or take a nap beforehand. I could sigh and wish I was an extrovert (and I have, many times). This year, I'm going to try to work within my own framework, instead of pretending to be someone I'm not. That'll only make me crash and burn. And the same goes for you.

Be true to yourself. Don't try and alter what makes you, you. Every change you make should lead you another step closer to a more joyful, healthy, and peaceful life, within the bounds of your own personality. We will never make it all the way there, not in this mortal life. But I've known people who've come pretty close.

So that's what New Year's means to me. Another of my resoultions is to blog every week, journal every day and write as much as possible. A writer is who I am. By, sometimes forcibly, making myself write, I'm not being untrue to myself. I'm just giving myself a little extra push on the pathway to being the best version of me. I know I'll never get there but it doesn't hurt to try.

Now, on to some 2020 memories I'd like to share with you! All of them - yes, all of them, even the dumb ones - are in here on purpose. You might not understand all the pictures without context. I tried to caption them but couldn't figure out how #techgenius lol. Anyway just know that all of them represent to me a special memory, whether it be good, bad, or dumb.

January-May slideshow

Summer Slideshow

The Two and A Half Months We Lived in An RV On Purpose :) Slideshow

Starring: my dog

Winter 2020 Slideshow

Looking back on these pictures reminds me of life, and how lucky I am to have mine. 2020 was a good year, for me, ultimately. I'm very grateful for every memory. I can't wait to make more.

#reflection #weeklybloggingchallenge #personal #memory #love


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